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Sorry everyone for my absentia. Hubby had an perforated ulcer and we did some quality ER/hosital/doctor time. If you haven't spent any time in a medical facility lately, let me assure you how much fun it is to wait with your loved one on a gurney outside in the hall watching doctors and other various medical personnel scurry back and forth for seven hours. I finally decided to take my laptop with me for the endless medicinal procedures so at least I had something to do besides listen to the melodious sound of my husband's pain. Poor guy.

The school year is shaping up nicely. I had my first evaluation from the state. In October, the national committee will be down to observe.

I am so far behind on DA life, there is no way I'll ever be able to catch up. I know I owe some people some contest winning prizes and I promise to to fulfill those obligations this week and I apologize for the delay.

I hope you all are doing well.

Thank you, Mel for my gorgeous stamp!

Cheers
~iMp~


~ Do pediatricians play miniature golf on Wednesdays? ~
***************************************
The student - not necessarily a well-prepared student - sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper.

The question directed: "Give four advantages of breast milk."

What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:

1. No need to boil.

2. Cats can't steal it.

3. Available whenever necessary.

Um. So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a four-part answer.

Again, what to write? Once more he sighed. He frowned. He scowled. Then sighed again.

But suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly he scribbled his definitive answer:

4. Available in attractive containers.

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I have finally caught up with my 2500 deviation watches, and am working on everything else now.
(Dang, I am s l o w! )
If I can only keep up this time.

I was tagged. *insert expletive here*
I'm am not going to name the guilty party *cough* *meljoy68 *cough*

I know it's going to take forever for me to come up with enough interesting things to complete this taggage ...

1. I am very disorganized. I have a hard time sticking to one task at a time so I have little piles of whatever I'm working on scattered around.

2. I have twins. Boy/girl - natural, they run in the family. My mom is a twin. Yes, it does skip a generation.

3. I lived in Puerto Rico from the age of 13 - 18.

4. I have a really hard time with my left and right. I don't know if it's because I'm left handed or I'm just naturally a big doof.

5. My name is Melissa, and I'm a Lost fan. There ... I feel so much better now that I've gotten that off my chest.

6. I love brain games. Crosswords, sudoku, anagrams, you name it.

7. I was in the Humacao Philharmonic Orchestra when I was 17 years old. Third chair flute. Ummm ... no flutes were harmed nor experimented with during this time period ... honest.

8. My grandfather was adopted in 1916 and the records were sealed by court order. Therefore we're not sure of our lineage, however, we have recently requested that these documents be opened. I'm pretty sure we're related to bootleggers.

I think I'm supposed to post the rules and re-tag five other people, but I seem to have misplaced the rules.

A big thank you to & for wonderful features.

Thank you, Mel for my gorgeous stamp!

Cheers
~iMp~


1. Dutch shoes used to be made in a factory machine, until it got clogged up.

2. I was only going to buy one ounce of pot from a friend but I got a pound instead. It was a smokin deal.

3. 'Come see my fishpond', she said coyly.

4. That's a cool chair. Yeah, I know, it rocks.

5. After getting pranked by his friends and getting hit with a basket, Aron knew they had a wickerd sense of humour.

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We're back!
Had a great time @ Disney. I mean really ... who doesn't?
Please forgive me for behind so far behind. With school starting in two weeks, life has gotten even more busy than usual. Hopefully, I'll be able to catch up with my deviant watches, etc.

A big thank you to & for wonderful features.

Also, a big Happy Birthday to FELICIDADES!!

Last, but not least ... *meljoy68 made me this gorgeous stamp. Thank you, Mel!

Cheers
~iMp~


Major groan-age ahead. Enjoy!

1. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
2. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
3. A backwards poet writes inverse.
4. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
5. He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
6. The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
7. One of the first things you'll notice at the Beijing airport is a whole lot of Chinese checkers.
8. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
9. To some - marriage is a word ... to others - a sentence.
10. The man put his name on the neck of his shirt so he would have collar ID.

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I cleared out my devwatch today.
(Now all I have left are comments, replies, journals ... )
Busy week this week. It was hubby's birthday yesterday, I did a face painting party today and earned some "mommy" money to spend in Disney! That's right, we're going to Disney World and we leave tomorrow. So you all have fun and play nice. We'll see you when we get back on Monday.
Cheers
~iMp~


I found these today and they made me smile (and groan), so I thought I'd share. Enjoy!

1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
3. I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
duncan - Victoria, BC
4. There was a sign on the lawn at a drug re-hab center that said 'Keep off the Grass'.
Dave H - Hayward CA
5. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
6. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
7. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.
8. There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.
9. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

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I found this today and thought I'd share. Enjoy!

In today's litigious society, products need ridiculously obvious instructions.

"Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.
"For external use only!" -- On a curling iron.
"Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron.
"Do not use while sleeping." -- On a hair dryer.
"Do not use while sleeping or unconscious." -- On a hand-held massaging device.
"Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking." -- On a toilet at a public sports facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
"Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." -- On a pair of shin guards made for bicyclists.
"This product not intended for use as a dental drill." -- On an electric rotary tool.
"Caution: Do not spray in eyes." -- On a container of underarm deodorant.
"May irritate eyes." -- On a can of self-defense pepper spray.
"Do not use orally." -- On a toilet bowl cleaning brush.
:bullet blue: "Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty.

Think Pink! [link] and [link]

- Cheers -